ALLEGATIONS The DARK side of Fostering and Adopting.

LIFE IS UNFAIR! Say it! It's OK! SAY it Again. Bad things DO happen to good people. Presently 30% of Foster homes leave fostering each year. Allegations and risk of allegations are one of the prime motivators to leave. What can you do? Who will you go for help and support? Can allegations be prevented? Will the system help me out?

You can get answers to all of these questions and more at the meeting Tuesday, March 12th. Allegation prevention training, support-development and survival skills are necessary for each family working with high risk children in group homes, foster home or adoptive home setting.

We cannot walk alone. And as we walk, we must make the pledge that we shall always march ahead. We cannot turn back. ~ Martin Luther King Jr. We are not here to scare you but to educate you. Foster parents are vulnerable to charges from both the children they care for and the birth parents that have been denied custody. Learn the steps to prevent allegations as well as to steps to take after the allegations have been made. Here is a list of ways to prevent allegations. We wit discuss these topics in more detail at the meeting.

1. Familiarize yourself and your family with the state regulations that govern out-of-home-care in the state in which you reside. Abide by those rules!
2. Get as much information about the child before you accept placement.
3. Don't be afraid to say no to a placement that could put you at risk. Protecting your license ensures care needed to the majority of children. Overindulging our pride by thinking we can save every child is of no benefit to anyone and many times results in a serious allegation.
4. Documentation.
   Take a few minutes each day to jot down in a SPIRAL notebook (one for each child) the events of that day, even if that day is the exact replica of the day before. The reason a spiral notebook is important is because the pages cannot be torn out without destroying the sequence of events. Jot down any change in behavior before and after a visit from a relative or social worker. Don't use your computer - changes are too easy.
5. Common Sense. A foster parent who does not use appropriate judgment could lose their license, their foster children and also face criminal charges.
6. Know your child's social worker well and let them know you.
7. Have written house rules with copies to each new placement and each child's social worker.
8. Networking & support groups. Foster parent support groups are excellent vehicles for disseminating information.